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Tropical Depression: Night of the White Guys
(Or, "I love parentheses and bacon!")
The recent holiday weekend re-aquatinted me with a very widespread sub-species of human.
The White Guy.
They inhabit many environments though, in "cultural" (i.e. non white-dominant) settings, are not known for their ability to blend in, perhaps because of their extreme whiteness.
Or it could be the part about tucking their shirts into their shorts.
I met some very nice White Guys this weekend and I am convinced that two of the main traits of this sub-species is that they can both grill and eat an entire cow...
With baked beans (with added bacon) and corn on the side...
And no interest in anything vegetable-like.
(But hard boiled eggs would not have been inappropriate).
Yet not one of them claimed to be able to out-eat the Hot Dog eating winner at that contest. (Though they each compared the old lady to his Grandma).
Damn Did We Eat: An entire aquaculture facility of shrimp, steaks honestly as big as my head, fish steaks as thick as my rainbow platform flip-flops and the aforementioned corn (with cob) and beans (and did I say bacon?),
My meager contribution to this All-American eating festival was a spinach salad (left lonely in the fridge until everyone was too damn full) and a kick ass drink recipe (see below). In defense of the spinach salad, it would have been appreciated as it contained bacon (yes!), cheese, hard-boiled eggs and yummy dressing.
Somehow we missed the fireworks. But a hot tub under the stars and doing handstands in the swimming pool made up for it.
America-Fuck Yeah! (the drink)
Some lemons and some limes: Squeezed!
A hand of fresh ginger: Grated!
Splenda : To Taste!
Vodka , Seltzer Water and Ice: In your favorite proportions!
