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sunshine jen: Dear Literary Novelists
Dear Literary Novelists,
Let me begin by saying how much I love literature. Yes, I do. I love reading both new and classic literary fiction. I love coming across a sentence so diabolically excellent that it could only be written by someone who really cares about writing and not only what they are writing but how they are writing it. I love when you guys send me to the dictionary. I love drinking down your language and ideas like an excellent Bordeaux.
I have a few small requests to make of you dear literary novelists. These requests don't apply to all of you, and you don't have to honor my requests. I really do not want to offend your literary sensibilities. I just hope you will hear me out.
First, please stop setting the first parts of your novels in an Ivy League or other prestigious college. Stop using the college experience as the metaphoric gateway from childhood to adulthood and as a place where characters develop their defining characteristics.
You might say, whoah Jen, who are you? Miss Working Class?
I'll let you in on a secret. I went to a prestige college and earned two (yes, two) fine arts degrees, so I feel your prestige school experience. I know what it's like to have the world open up to you in higher education and to find your aesthetic and your voice and your way of looking at the world. I know that many students at prestigious universities do not come from a privileged background and work hard.
I worked hard and I'm still working hard. When I'm on a break at my day job, I gotta tell ya, sometimes it's hard to read about the ivy league college experience with obvious metaphorical overtones. Yes, I read literature when I'm on work breaks.
My second request is to not make your protagonist a writer. Yes, I know, there have been a lot of great writer characters in the history of literature. Yes, I get the whole post post modern metaphor. You're a writer writing about a writer for a reader who is reading about a writer written by another writer.
If you must write a writer, could I please read one with back problems?
Also, I could use some suggestions on how to sit still to write for long periods of time. When I write, I can't sit still. I need to get up and move around. Excuse me a minute. I'll be right back.
Thirdly, the countryside. Now, I'm quirky. I don't mind two pages on the old oak tree once hit by lightning. I don't mind the use of lakes, rivers, and oceans as a gateway into the unconsciousness. I'm wondering if I could get some negativity in nature. It's not always so nice. I don't mind a bit of mud. Rain and snow is fun although I can see that it's not gonna end well for that car on an icy road.
So where does that leave you, my dear Literary Novelists? What are you to make of my requests? Yes, I realize that when my great literary novel about a writer who went to a prestigious college and now lives in the country comes out in trade paperback, you will all sigh collectively at the absurdity of my lack of originality.
Here's the beautiful thing about writing, dear Literary Novelists, you don't have to write anything. You don't have to write nothing. You have the freedom in the pen or the keyboard. What are you going to write today?
Perhaps the best way to read is this letter is as a fluffy piece of fun like pink cotton candy suffocating in a plastic bag. Write about the prestigious colleges, writer characters, and country scenes if you want, but if you do, write it well. In fact, just write everything well.
And it's okay to be funny.
Best Regards,
Sunshine Jen
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