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Art Colony: vacazion con malas peliculas
Monday, July 25, 2005
› by victoria
I hope, Robert, that you can pardon me and Biff for being in abscencia from your cena and party... my headache lasted, on-and-off, pretty much all weekend, so getting tipsy with friends would've probably made me even more ill.
That said, this weekend was intensely relaxing (oxymorons! i love them!). oh, but it so totally was. Robin and I watched as many films as we were able: anything from Alien 3000 to Team America to Elektra to Catwoman, we watched it. Definitely, Alien 3000 was the worst of the bunch. Biff expressed joy that "there are still people who make REALLY, really bad movies." And he was correct, in that this film was possibly worse than MANOS, THE HANDS OF FATE. Apparently, according to IMDB.com, its alternate (?) title is Unseen Evil 2 , and that's precisely what it should remain--unseen, because that's how awful it is. The dialogue consisted entirely of the words "bitch," "psycho," "kill(ed)," "Bureau for Paranormal Investigation," "fuck!" and possibly "gold" and "cursed." The cover of the DVD release makes it look like a hybrid of "Alien" and "Predator" but in reality, the monster is more like the bastardization of a Mighty Morphins Power Ranger villain. I'm so serious. It was awful. The movie, besides featuring lots of random profanity, also had a gratuitous b00b shot, the most unintentionally ridiculous sex scene I have ever seen in my life (I mean, any scene where there's a guy shouting "I'm...rich...unh...like...Colonel...SANDERS!....or JEFF...unh...FOX-WOR-THY!" is painfully hilarious), and Lorenzo Lamas. They even had a fake mini-helicopter that was supposed to be "the chopper" and then for interior shots of the helicopter they would switch to a small dark room filled with blinky lights. Yes, it was that bad. I enjoyed it immensely.
Watching "The Life Aquatic" atoned for my "Alien 3000" sins.
Other than that, Wisconsin went through a heat wave as the temperature hovered around 100 degrees all weekend. Thank goodness, we enjoyed a/c (a privilege we do not have in apartment) and all was well. Hopefully Jill's foot will have improved as well. And we made linguine with clam sauce. All-in-all, a very fun weekend.
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