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poop beetle: 25 things- mostly me.
5.2004
1. The king of the gypsies of Kansas City Kansas attended my grandfather's funeral.
2. One of my two dads once rode a ten-speed bike from Kansas City, KS to Oregon.
He wore a handle bar mustache at the time and to differentiate between him and my other father he was called "daddy-with-the-mustache".
3. I once rode in a parade lap at Rockingham speedway, with my other dad (daddy- without -the-mustache), in a '65 Pontiac GTO.
4. Years later, after the other one shaved, we found out the mustache identifier was a source of discomfort and hurt feelings.
5. I once worked as a shoeshine girl.
6. I once worked as a spy for the hospitality industry.
7. I once accidentally set a fire on a school bus and somehow got away with it. The principal made us sit for 45 minutes in the boiling sun to find out who had done it. I was frozen and terrified and even though I was not particularly close to my fellow bus riders, no one told on me.
8. Along the line of fires, I once stepped into a ditch that was full of smoldering brush. I was 4 or 5 and I remember looking at the feathery ash and thinking "oooh, fluffy!" I don't remember the pain but I remember screaming. And I remember my mom grabbing me and throwing me on the ground, rolling me in the dirt and whacking me and I remember- because I didn't realize at that moment I was on fire, it really hurt my feelings.
9. I like tomato sandwiches with cheap yellow mustard.
a. I like potato chip sandwiches with cheap yellow mustard.
b. I've been known to eat two pieces of bread with only mustard in between.
10. Another gross thing I'll eat and enjoy is canned lima beans- from the can.
11. I don't cook.
12. Both my ex-husbands were excellent cooks.
13. I'm done with "Law and Order".- all of them, no interest, no excitement. We had a good run but they just don't do it for me anymore.
14. I was the only one of the eight children my mother raised who ever got a good citizenship award in school. I hated school.
15. One year I was voted YMCA day camper of the year. I was awarded the coveted plastic bear claw necklace. I was 6 and yes, I still have it.
16. I once worked for two weeks with a Methodist youth group fixing the houses of poor people in Hazard County, Kentucky. I crawled under a house and put up insulation. It was real itchy. It was one of the better things I've ever done.
17. I failed my driving exam three times. Before taking it for the fourth time, my uncle, who'd taught the South Vietnamese to fly helicopters, was recruited to come out and prep me.
18. I worked several years in restaurants- hostess, waitress, fry cook, dishwasher and for that reason I hate to go out to eat. I can't relax. I can't not be aware of everyone running around doing their dead-end job. I'm overly aware of the mix of smells that include catsup (all restaurants smell of catsup) the burnt smell of carpet that has had food vacuumed out of it and dirty lemon or freesia scented mop water.
19. Despite the fact I've also worked in a lot of bars, I don't really have a problem with bars.
20. The last movie I saw at the theatre was "Fight Club".
21. In 8 out of 10 poker games I've participated in, I've won big.
22. I have no inherent sense of direction. I've compensated for this by paying attention to road signs and landmarks. If you ask me how to get somewhere I will give you so much detail it will make your brain hurt.
23. I have this thing for Mexico. It's a long story (actually several stories), but I imagine my self living there in my 60's, if not before.
24. Ummmm
25. This was fun.
