2001:November:12
2001
Ahhhhhhh sweet bliss. I'm still hanging on to the utter perfection of waking up in my sweet little cottage with my beloved sleepily nuzzled beside me and lil' Stripey purring at the food of the bed. Once again, I'm faced with a Monday again. Driving down the road to work (skipped biology and hope I do OK on the test Wed) I couldn't help but long that it was the 1940's and I was a barren housewife. Ah well, broken record. This week is looking WAY less annoying than last week (and it probably is due to last week being so annoying). Ah time. It doth keep on tickin tickin tickin into the future. I was much more equipped this weekend to live in the moment. I tried not to think about a countdown to Monday as much as I usually do, and I think this worked to a good degree. I had another fabulous weekend and even the group project that I had to attend on Saturday didn't mar it. I'm not sure how long it will last, but I think the only requirements to happiness that I have are that Mark be in a reasonably normal mood and that we exist in our lil' house. He's been super worried about money as the clock is ticking to how long we can survive (unaided) with no real income. But alas, my thinking is that there is nothing we can do about it right this instant that we're not already doing, so worrying about it only is good in that it primes you for making a decision when the time comes. If you already are primed to make a decision from prior worrying, then worrying incessantly merely ruins the time you have in the present. Although who am I to speak? I don't even know how much money we have in the bank account or what our bills are. I just give my paycheck every two weeks to Mark and borrow the bank card every now and again. It's a very nice situation for me, and I feel very lucky.
Ah there it is. My current worry is that it's all too easy. I'm actually DOING something with my life, I have a man who I adore and who understands me, I have a house that is perfect for me (even if we never are able to afford an addition on it), I have very interesting friends, I feel a certain understanding calm about the world and my place in it (except for a bout of PMS every 3rd month), I've developed a way to deal with "when bad things happen to good people" (it's all learning), I have amazingly cute and precious cats, I live in an age when I live a more luxurious life than the richest Sultan in the 1800's (electricity, plumbing, heat, a/c, etc), Entertainment has never been better (Mark and I rented - ON DVD NO LESS - Sandra Bernhard's "I'm Still Here Dammit" , and it made me so happy to have her in the world. I love Farscape. Cable gives us ST-TNG every weekday as well. I also love Dr. Phil Tuesdays on Oprah and Thursday nights on HGTV).
So, it's lil' ole pollyanna eh? No no no. I still have many freak out attacks and hate life, etc. I just currently have somewhat of a hold on things. The other day, I calmly thought how OK I would be if a sniper were to shoot me dead while I was crossing the pine-forest campus of UNCW one evening last week. All the worry and wondering would be over, and I would have died very happy (I had just gotten an "A" on my big, sloppy, rushed group project).
Mark said something yesterday (well two cute things - the other one was while we were walking home last night from Pub Trivia, he said "I may be so dumb and stupid, but you have to deal with me like this forever." which just says it all AND it's funny) that struck me as true although I hadn't realized it. I have always had a marked distaste for drop-ins. As I've stunningly revealed in earlier posts, I have recently admitted that I'm not spontaneous nor do I unequivocally like surprises. My stated acceptable type of drop-in has always been the phone called "we're coming over right now". Well, hello. Unbeknownst to me, I live in a home that almost daily has at least one drop in. On the weekends, it's usually every four hours. I suppose I just haven't caught on - hadn't realized it as it happened so slowly. In fact, I think that is what is so great about living downtown is indeed the drop-in factor. So, the cute thing Mark said yesterday was surprising but true. He said that drop-ins were really the best way to see your friends a lot of times because he is so annoyed with trying to call around and plan things and you leave someone out usually, etc. He said that it was so nice just to visit and always semi-expect visitors and that it makes the day so much more unexpected. He says it makes life way more "ultimate teens" (which if I haven't stated before is Mark and my current philosophy).
Also, I'm really into my cats lately, and I'm not afraid to say it. This cute morning, there was Stripey at the foot of the bed purring and sleeping and waiting for Mark or I to get up (he'd already done his hourly crying since 6am)... and then there was cute lil' Pads. When I staggered into the kitchen to make toast and coffee, I noticed that the plate of bacon Mark and I had left on the table from Sunday morning's breakfast (is that toooo gross to even reveal) was stripped clean and Pads was standing over it still sniffing a strip of bacon. I threw away the few strips remaining on the side of the plate and proceeded to get ready to get out the house and heard this gagging vomit noise from under the table. Little Pads was puking. She dramatically puked up a big pile of bacon bits. It was so funny to me. I was sitting there telling her " The Mommy will clean it up. Are you OK?" I feel so much like a mother to these little fur babies. I can't imagine an easier child, and they give back so much love. Josh and Kent said a sweet thing about cat owners. They said that they noticed that cats were very indicative of their owners. It's funny to imagine that "raising" Stripey, Marbles, and Pads a certain way could change their personality. Oh it's bliss to me to own cats. Did you know that as a child I was horribly allergic to cats. I loved them and would touch them all the chances I got, but I would always break out in hives, sneeze my damn head off, and wheeze. It makes it so amazing to be able to kiss their little bellies nowadays. There, now maybe I won't need to spew kitty love for a while.
Pub Trivia was another hoot last night. I love Wilmington because we have Pub Trivia. It's so fun to get semi-bundled up and walk downtown to our "Irish" pub: the Shanakee and drink Harp and Guiness and play trivia. Last night, there was a big cotillion. We had two tables of friends and Caleb Womble even came out (he's gay!). For some reason (maybe egomaniacilly) I really love making up team names. For two times in a row, I've gotten to name one other team besides myself. I always stay at least until the half-time (as it's a schoolnight, 11:30-ish is my limit) when they read out the team names with the score. This time, both of the teams I named were back to back near the front... so the announcer announces "Gravity Box at 210, Pigs-Hounds-and-Dwarves at 210, The Come Majors at 210...." Oh I laughed (although because I'm getting over some lung cold, I "laugh" by smiling really big and nodding my head so as not to hack phlem) so hard! Also my favorite answer that my team gave to "What serial killer murdered so and so?" was formulated after Kief kept thinking he knew it and kept thinking it was something Mendez... and then he kept getting clear and he finally thought he had it: "Rodriguez Mendez" Yeah, he thought that was it! Of course it turned out to be something like "Roberto Menzeula" but close, and for some reason it cracked me up putting "Rodriquez Mendez". That's what's cute about Pub Trivia. The questions are usually so obscure that not many people know them, and it's funny to make up answers. Not that you might think this was funny, but for one of our answers (My team was "Pigs, Hounds, and Dwarves".) we actually answered "I'm going to kill you."
Now, I'm done talking, and I've got to get to work. Boss is going to the North Carolina Science Teachers Association this week, and there's muchos work.
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