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solstice: The Sister | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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›comments[7] ›all comments ›post #53 ›bio: kristen ›perma-link ›3/27/2005 ›18:56 ›archives ›first post ›that week
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Meredith was born... on January 29, 1963? I don't want to do the math. She's about 41 or 42. She is now known as Meredith to everyone else. First, I'll start with her latest husband - the father of her twin girls: chandler and ellison (they were born on June 18th which makes them gemini's born on Father's Day)... Mother just wrote me. Chris (he's now an ex-husband who she was very generous with out of guilt for wanting out of the marriage) was in a wreck last night. He totaled his car and got a DUI... but isn't hurt "too badly". The Christmas shortly before I had my first manic attack was the one that my mother had her colon cancer scare (she is the healthiest eater and excersizes religiously - mostly at curves ((whose founder contributes openly to anti-choice - but i didn't have the heart to tell her)) .)... Chris did the freakiest thing I've ever witnessed. Meri and Chris were having troubles. Once the woo-ing was over, he became a secret stoner (well he apparently was always one) who watched sports like a boring freak and would fall asleep every night in front of the teevee. He criticized my sister all the time in order to try and make her share his pain. I don't like him very much. He hates me. He calls me "your crazy freak of a sister". It was Christmas eve eve. We were in the finished (my stepfather is a huge huge handyman who loves to decorate and has ALWAYS had a remodeling project always...) basement drinking it up as is our wont. My stepfather mentioned that he had viagra. He had gone in for treatment on his mysteriously pained elbow/shoulder... and they gave him free samples of viagra. Terry (my stepvater) hadn't yet taken any (he didn't need it he proudly proclaimed. He always talks about their amazing sex life - which I have just accepted at this point). Chris was drunk as a skunk and insisted on seeing it. Terry obliged, and Chris took two before we could say 'boo'. The mayhem ensued. The twins were on the third floor soundly asleep. My mother and Terry and I knew that my sister and chris hadn't had sex in six months and weren't likely to. Chris mentioned that perhaps now my sister would have sex with him. I think earlier that night or later - hazy - I had had a go at him and talked about what a self-centered ass he is. He refused to go to marriage counseling because he thought the counselor would be on meri's side. Anyhoo, this was it for me. Sure it was a fucking huge cry of pain on his part, but my sister is my sister and my loyalties lie there. Terry said that he passed out on the sofa and later told terry that he had a boner for the whole night and part of the next morning. I slept with my sister and told her I had changed my view (earlier it had been: stay married at all costs. Try everything you can as divorce is HORRIBLE for children. We knew.) This night, I changed. I insisted that my sister get a divorce. God please get a divorce from this man. Chris had a huge hangover the next morning. Christmas came and went, and they did the divorce stuff in the spring. [pb] Meri was the sweet one. She is a classic middle child even though I didn't come along until 9 years after her. My grandmother martin was THRILLED to FINALLY have a girl. She bought meri clothes ad nauseum and a pink bedroom suite... all the stuff. Meri never counted presents. Meri really disliked me when I was a child. She teased me all the time (about my protruding three year old stomach in a bikini). She always accused me of liking Billy better than her. Although I insisted I didn't, of course I did. Billy was nice to me. Meri and I shared a room. I don't know why I did this, but I remember peeing on the floor on my side of the room. Stories I'm telling you. She was a swimmer. That was her thing. I shared her eating dry jello before the competions. When my father told her she had chunky legs, she wore pants for an entire summer. Apparently my father never noticed (nor did my mother). My sister was wild.. She was an excellent student ALWAYS. She would party her ass off and get A's. Later, when she went back to school at greenville (SC) tech.... she was valedictorian of her class. My sister went to Catholic High School in Macon. At the time, Macon was one of the last places that had sororities at the high school level. She chose S.O.S. There colours were red and white - like gangs they had colours. I was for SMB as they had green and white as their colours, but I was loyal to my sister. My sister was famous in our family for being one of the only people ever to get a bid from all three of the sororities. Her nursing program was sidelined by bulimia. My sister was the trendsetter for bulimia. No one knew what it was at the time. She was pulled out of West Georgia College to deal with it. My sister was shipped to live with my father and his second wife (ann martin - even before she married my father she was a martin ((from her first husband: jimmy martin)).) They lived in Greenville, SC. My sister is really more south carolina than georgian. Mark worked on a pilot with andie macdowell and says that my sister and she have the exact same accent. South Carolina is very different from Georgia's accent. At this point, I adored my sister. I visited them for a month every summer. (another pee story, I would have this dream where I was in the bathtub and I would wet the bed. I was about seven jeesh). We would all pack off to go to Folly Beach. Ann and Daddy would go in the mercedes (ann was very loyal to mercedes and status). Meri and I got to often drive the excaliber (some neat car that ann had that was a copy of some other famous old car). I remember meri was into 'beach music' which I think is the commodores and diana ross. I have a great memory of us listening to 'upside down you're turning me. you're giving love increasingly. I say upside down. boy you turn me' while driving to the beach house. Meri was an excellent dancer. She and my mother both know how to shag. I am not very good at dance moves, and was only good at doing the Bump (which anyone can do). [pb] Meredith got married to Kelly at age 20. She and my mother and brother and aunt all got married at 20. My grandmother and I are the only ones who made it past 25 without marriage (I lasted to 29). I adored Kelly. He had a landscaping company. He was blond. He was funny. He would get stoned (although I didn't know this until later). They had a fabulous duplex that they owned in lovely downtown greenville (several blocks away from my father and ann's mansion ((that my father renovated from a burned-out biker house)) on Earl Street). Kelly had the eddie murphy record. I fondly remember 'i want some ice cream. i want some ice cream. One of my favorite memories of them was when Meri was very business like recording the answering machine message for kelly's company... "Hello this is S & A landscaping. We are unable to take your call, but please leave a message and we'll get back to you as soon as possible.... (then kelly -with perfect timing- said "we smoke dope"..." Meri was pissed. Kelly and I laughed like banshees. She said he really loved me and once had a dream that I died and woke up crying. Kelly liked the drink, and he is the only person I have ever experienced sleepwalking. I was in the guest bed, and he said "kristy, move over" and got in the bed. I wasn't traumatized. I trusted kelly. He was very safe, but I went and told my sister. She said he was just sleepwalking, and I slept with her. Another memory was when my parents (this is always terry and my mom when I say it) wanted to go to a movie and I couldn't be left alone. They went to the movie palace where my sister worked (free popcorn you betcha) and asked the attendant if "The Shining" was OK for kids. He said that it only had one nude scene. So I saw "The Shining" at 8 years old. I slept with my sister for a month. I think it is sweet that she let me. During this time, I would love to go get the mail. I would deliver it to the appropriate parties. Sometimes I would get a letter from grandmommy sutherland. Well, a letter came to Mary Joan Martin (my mother's first name is mary). I delivered it to meri. It was my mother's check from school (she was a schoolteacher). Meri cashed it. She was wild. She got in big trouble. My stepfather once chased her. She hid in my room and locked the door. I was playing with my big head barbie that you could put makeup on. I was terrified as he was yelling at her to come out. I begged he to go. Terry punched a hole right through my cheap 80's bedroom door. I was pissed at meri because I didn't have a door on my room for a month. [pb] Currently, Meri is the rich one. She makes $250,000 a year (plus bonuses). She is a registered nurse who very successfully sells hill rom hospital beds. She has troubles in love. She has been divorced twice and goes out always with two people at once. One is always the ass kisser and one is always an elusive older man (usually either a few years younger or older than my stepfather - who is seven years younger than my mother). She loves her girls very very very much. If you really want to set her off, imply in the slightest most innocent way that she is not the perfect mother. They were very poor in her childhood. They had shit repossessed and lights turned off. I never knew this as terry was always (except for those six months that he got laid off - which was when he would walk around in his green bathrobe and never talk - and once punched a hole in my door). Meri now showers her children with stuff, stuff, and stuff. My mother and I talk about her behind her back. I mentioned to mother dr. phil's "overindulgence is the most insidious form of child abuse" statement. I love meri. I would call her crying in my childhood to talk about how mother always was distant and terry would go for days without talking to me. She said she didn't know how I could live like that and that I was always welcome to come live with her... but I had my friends. I was really really pissed when she came to visit me when Mark was in California and I was in love with brian and she (with mark's permission) committed me (my second and latest) to the Duplin County Psychiatric ward. This trip to 'the home' drained all life out of me. I was a shell for two years (just coming out of it in the last months)... so ashamed. so betrayed. I didn't talk to her for a year and vowed to never talk to her again. I said I would talk to her children because I loved them but "NEVER YOU. I AM NOT MANIC. I was manic two weeks ago. Where were you then?". She left me after committing me to go attend to her spoiled (yes they are) children. I was hurt even by this. I used to have the twins visit me sans meri for a week each year. But I forgive her totally now. What a horrible situation to be in. We really aren't that close and only talk once a year on a red-wine fueled night... besides christmas. She was really going on mark's word and my friends. What a horrible situation for all involved. I am very very very sorry that I have manic depression and try very hard now to comply. It's all about me, me, me. Meri is coming to visit me in california tomorrow - with chandler and ellison. I am very calm about it. My family used to send me in shivers. I always felt adopted. In fact, meri told me I was when i was a kid. Meri also hated onions (and still does). I hated them too until I was twenty and tried my first onion. Now I love onions. One of meri's nicknames was puddles because she wet the bed as a child. She's my sister, and by god I'd walk through fire for her. Is this the longest post I've ever written? Stories I'm telling you. [pb]
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