Don't leave. Offer them a seat and say, "I wanted to talk with you anyway. Just give me a second."
Lose consciousness immediately. Do not awake until you are absolutely positive they are gone.
Tell them that you'd heard about this while watching television, and thought you might check it out.
Engage them in banal conversation. Example: Announce your love of tennis, and how you might take it up soon. This would also work well with other sports such as golf, racquet ball and shuffleboard. Do not under any circumstances mention sports such as football, ice hockey or baseball.
Leave the room immediately. Running is always an option. Do not stop to do any dressing or clean-up activities. Just leave the room. It is highly unlikely that the other person will pursue you or bring this incident up in a future conversation. If they do, deny it in the hopes that their discomfort level will surpass your own.
Hypnotize them and erase the memory from their mind. While you have them under your spell, make suggestions that will cause them moderate embarrassment in public situations.
Begin to cry. Summon images of deep sadness and loss. Most people will offer comfort to a crying person, but no one will offer comfort to a crying person who also happens to be masturbating, not even your parents.
Say to them, "You'll never guess how this ends. It's so wild."
