Open Call For fun I thought I would put out a "happyrobot wants you" application to see if there are people out there who have the writing bug and may want to contribute to the robot in one way or another. We'll see what we get.
Creepy Love Stinks Good lord I don't want to bite the hand that feeds ("the hand" being users who care enough to contribute content) but last month we had that real wacky Love Stinks column... "un-evolved love"
Did you read that one? It really stands out in sharp contrast to everyone else's.
Hell, Here I come That jackass f*cker who is being accused of killing his pregnant wife - ugh.
Then, Saturday there is a story in the paper about some f*ckface mother throwing her 3yr old son into the San Francisco bay. Good lord people. The kid is fine, but how do you grow up with the fact that your mother tried to kill you? Sad Sad Sad. Toddler tossed in strait rescued - Mother threw him over railing in Vallejo
Picking your nose Is it just NYC (i think it may be), but do 90% of the people in this town just stand around picking their noses in public. I mean, really picking. Good lord people, didn't your mother teach you anything.
I was enjoying watching the woman on the train the other day with two small children coughing and she is standing there digging into her nose. Sweet, lady. Now go hold the pole. Thanks for the SARS.
Teen Poo Speaking of teens, don't ask why I was thinking about this (Mrs. Robot already did), but I don't think I ever pooped during high school. I mean, in the actual building's bathrooms. Even stranger, from all the high school memories I have, I cannot remember a single bathroom. I was there for 3 years, and I didn't poop there once? Were our poopers built differently at that time?
Now, it wasn't as if the bathrooms were 'My Body Guard" nightmares with smoking bullies and fighting. I don't think they were, of course it seems like I never went.
The reason this seemed odd to me was because I can remember bathrooms from like all 459 offices I have worked in for the past six years.
Food Poison Once, in the high school, I got some kind of food poisoning. I was out for a week, and everyday was a new and interesting material coming out of various parts of my body. It was way fun. This was the week I watched 'Better Off Dead' 24 times. I loved that French girl. I, er, mean Freedom Girl.
Tragically and/or coincidentally a boy my same age with my SAME NAME was murdered in a nearby town. He was killed by his boy scout troop leader.
A few people in my high school were freaked out and thought that it might be me (except I wasn't ever in the Boy Scouts). My pal George's mom freaked out and called my mom when she heard it on the news.
Homophobe There was a gay guy in our 9th grade class. We were all pretty mean to him. We were mean to about anyone that was either not a girl or not someone that could beat us up. Stupid fucking kids.
If you knew what a doofus I was in the 9th grade, you would find it ironic that I was able to pick on anyone.
Coldplay Well, I tried to like them. Not getting it. They make me cringe a little too often.
