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Leon and all dismissive avoidants connect best with Narcissists. How sad. How freeing.
how something.
And anyone that knows me knows that I've wrestled with being a narcissist because I think about myself so much. I even have a nom de plume I give myself to shit on me before you can shit on me: Narcissi
Obviously, I've been to a great deal of therapy. My favorite was after the divorce the wacky Cheryl when I confessed to her "sometimes I think I'm a narcissist." She looked me in the eye and said "honey, your father was the definition of a narcissist, and your mother might be one too, but I can tell you and reassure you beyond a shadow of a doubt - you are most definitely not a narcissist."
I just think
so
much
and I don't get out much.
Today, I'm headed to somewhere just to make myself get out of the house - trivia might be a bit fucking hard, but maybe maybe.
and it makes me so sad for him.
I almost wanted to break my pathetic 4-day streak of not texting him and go "DUDE YOU ARE SO BROKEN YOU FEEL MOST COMFORTABLE WITH NARCISSISTS!!!!!!"
but I didn't.
and won't.
I'm kind of done with begging him to see me - begging him to want me.
he didn't.
he saw me.
he tried his best to see as little about me as possible.
and you know the coolest thing?
I would vomit if I thought I was a narcissist or at least go to intensive therapy, but this proves
bitch
I ain't no narcissist so shut it.
god knows what I am, but not that.
phew.
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