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Teen News: Cheese and Spaceman
Caught with a few hours to kill yesterday afternoon, I aimlessly wandered the streets of New York in search of any and all form of amusement. To that end I came across a man dressed as a wedge of cheese. From behind all I saw was the wedge with two very human legs (in jeans) sticking out of the bottom. As I maneuvered 'round in front of it (him? her?) I realized the cheese was an ad for a new grocery chain. The cheese had a mesh vent near his big smiley mouth so the human inside could get fresh air. Another man stood near the cheese. He held the informative leaflets and did all the shouting of praise for the chain. The poor cheese had to be hot. It was quite a muggy afternoon and I could see cheese's posture was giving a little.
Impressive though the cheese suit was, it reminded me of another suit I hadn't seen in quite a while. The giant spaceman. Giant spaceman used to hang out in front of a 3-D movie theater in Times Square. That theater and all the buildings around it were eventually razed and rebuilt into the new Reuters headquarters. Anyway, the giant spaceman stood about 12 feet tall and looked like your basic astronaut, helmet and all. He also had a mesh vent in his chest for the human inside to see and breathe. Still, giant spaceman was just so...puffy. I think he was attached to a fan that kept him inflated. If that fan were to turn off the spaceman would probably crumble under the weight of all that fabric suddenly giving way, much like the 'inflatable funhouse' attraction at most carnivals; the one where all the kids take their shoes off and get in and spend a few hours jumping around til they pass out. I was in one of those things in college, and the fan turned off, causing the entire structure to slowly collapse around us as we struggled to exit via the tiny hole. It was like that Great White concert, minus the fire but plus the fun!
I always wanted to rent the giant spaceman outfit and just walk around in it for no promotional reason other than to promote my love of that silly outfit. If anyone knows where I can find one, please let me know.
