Our farmers' pledge: no artificial growth hormones
Monsanto Sues Dairy in Maine Over Label's Remarks on Hormones
Here is the basic gist of this article that was in the NYT Saturday.
1. Monsanto is the main manufacturer of artificial growth hormones for moo-cows.
2. Small diary companies who don't use the hormones use that fact to market their products.
3. Monsanto says that these companies "suggest that milk that comes from cows treated with artificial growth hormones is somehow unsafe or lower in quality."
4. Monsanto would like to outlaw the ability to label your dairy product to say that it doesn't contain growth hormones.
"Science" says we have nothing to worry about in regards to moo-cows and growth hormones.
Nothing to worry about. Excuse me while I go compile my list of other things "Science" told me not to worry about.
I am so looking forward to the day when they have to cover up the fact that growth hormones or genetically modified foods cause extra appendages to suddenly grow or explosive diarrhea.
Bush Aides Now Say Claim on Uranium Was Accurate
I love this sentence - let's all read it together:
WASHINGTON, July 13 Senior Bush administration officials today adjusted their defense of President Bush's claim in his State of the Union Address that Iraq tried to buy uranium from Africa, insisting that the phrasing was accurate even if some of the underlying evidence was unsubstantiated.
from the NYT
OK, I have to give them props for a nice example of double-speak here - but, really, what the f*ck does this mean?
The phrasing was accurate? OK.
The Evidence was unsubstantiated? OK.
"Substantiated - to establish by proof or competent evidence"
You know, another way to word that would be:
The Evidence was made-up.
The Evidence was a rumor.
The Evidence came from the guy at the coffee cart on the street.
The Evidence was made-up because I am f*cking idiot.
You know, this isn't even an Anti-George Bush thing for me. This is a 'I hate you f*cking government monkeys so much I could scream'.
Republicans? Hate 'em.
Democrats? Hate 'em.
Libertarians? Hate 'em (I would assume).
Ross Perot? Find him hilarious.
Goat. Scape. George Tenet. See ya.
Beach
We went to the beach Sunday. Lovely day. The water was quite chilly, but after your body finished convulsing and the nerve damage subsided, it wasn't bad at all.
I realized that as a teen, I never had any fun teen beach adventures. You know, hanging out with friends on the beach and being goofballs.
My family always went to these desolate beaches and my brother and I would just have to spend the whole time building sand castles or playing in the surf.
There were never any teens around it seemed.
Oh, the point is that the teens near us were all being goofy. One of the girls was doing that sunning her back with her bathing suit top undone. This boy was tickling her and she just lost it and jumped up giving the whole beach a view of teen boobies.
The point is: Sadly, this never happened when I was a teen. All the girls at the beach when I was a teen seemed to wear burkas.
Please note:
happyrobot contains no artificial growth hormones
McSweeneys: The Ultimate Makeover
They did a slight facelift. Slight. I was expecting nutty makeover, but this is definitely slight.
This was good: How could he know about my hidden agenda
Lovely News
Commodore 64 Makes a Comeback: Popular computers, games from the 1980s will be relaunched
Tulip Computers, which owns the Commodore brand name, plans to relaunch the brand to take advantage in an upsurge of interest in the obsolete Commodore 64 (C64) computer and its 1980s-era games, the company said in a statement Friday
