Hoax. Hoax. Hoax. We were enjoying a rather nice afternoon in the city when I got the text message that HonkeyCracker and Stu were actually still in NYC. As in they never really left.
So. Apparently, this was a well crafted little hoax they played. Apologies to Victoria who's feelings may be hurt (then again, just because these two can't make it to your party shouldn't put a dent in your festivities).
Um. OK.
Status (Text Message)
Fri 04:38pm: "Traffic Jam at GWB. But we're on our way."
Fri 06:28pm: "Traffic sucks so hard. On I-80, passing Danville (PA) now."
Fri 08:57pm: "Hit some open road, now 5 miles out of Clearfield, PA. Napped a little. Might try driving later, maybe at Cleveland (198 miles, a sign just said)"
Fri 09:19pm: "Just passed 'highest point on I-80 east of the Mississippi' according to a sign at mile marker 111. All downhill from here."
Fri 10:02pm: "At rest stop east of Falls Creek, PA. Mile marker 88, I think. Running out of cigarettes"
Fri 10:09pm: "Eleven miles outside of Ohio"
Fri 10:25pm: "We have listened to all the neutral milk hotel that exists. What now." (I replied: "Sufjan?")
Fri 10:31pm: "The stupidity of this is starting to sink in"
Fri 10:38pm: "Saving Sufjan for post-Cleveland, as we pass MI and approach Illinois"
Fri 11:07pm: "Is happyrobot a corporation? Can we deduct this as a business expense? Because FUCK, is gas expensive! Cell reception here is spotty too."
Fri 11:42pm: "Chris almost swerved off the road trying to read your last text, but we're okay now. (he blames automatics)."
Fri 11:54pm: "Stopping for gas. Stu is wearing a shumai shirt. Total gaylord recordz rulz."
Sat 12:21am: "Crossing into Ohio... Now!"
Sat 01:13am: "We were almost 20 miles out of Cleveland when a shot of wild turkey convinced me to let Stu drive on an expired license for a while. What are they going to do? Bob Pollard us to death?"
Halfway there! Miles completed: 448 Miles to go: 431
Sat 01:44am: "'We can't stop here. This is robot country!'"
Sat 02:00am: "I apologize for the lame Bob Pollard reference. But, fuck. We were in Ohio. We need 2 p33."
Sat 02:09am: "Pee break. Getting tired, but a couple of hours out of Chicago. Friend in town we might stay with."
Sat 02:50am: "I'm going to drive now. No license but I'll be good. Chris has had some whiskey and is going to try to nap now."
Sat 01:06pm: "Rock over robots, rock on Chicago! We crashed at my friend Mark's and grabbed some much needed sleep. Back on the road now. Chris driving. 3 Hours to Milwaukee, I think."
For the record You people are nuts.
Well, while we're all here Here's 18 of mine for Friday....
elliott smith: shooting star gumball: butterfly potion Bicycle Face: Speck of Dust the incredible moses leroy: christmas in the summertime The Stars: Don't Be Afraid To Sing the dismemberment plan: back and forth wrens: she sends kisses Sebadoh: Pound My Skinny Head unwound: what was wound The Smiths: London Sufjan Stevens: Casimir Pulaski Day the beach boys: mrs. o'leary's cow andre 3000: happy valentine's day Mary Lou Lord: Salem '76 Elvis Presley: I Don't Care of the Sun Don't Shine Brian Wilson: Wind Chimes Weirdos: We Got The Neutron Bomb Public Enemy: A Letter to the New York Post