comfortably asleep on my shoulder
by ctrn.net
 |
On the platform in at Union Square I was so tired I could barely stand. I was working my way through design school doing freelance projects and making whatever extra money I could as a waitress and an artist model. I managed to get by but I hardly ever slept and I frequently ached.
So that day with iced coffee in hand and a ton of books in my bag I was heading uptown for reasons I don't recall now. I could feel the weight of everything on me. It was a crowded platform at rush hour. The heat and the foul smells magnified the tense anticipation of the trains arrival. I could feel the drip of condensation from the plastic cup mixing with the sweat on my skin. Cool drops hit my legs and my open toed shoes.
The car that finally pulled up was almost empty, probably because there was no AC. I found a seat and the moments started to slightly blur with the flickering light and the glowing luminance from the bowels of the dark tunnels. Drifting in my consciousness I fought to keep my eyes open. Weakly exploring my arsenal of tricks to focus my mind into an alert state I looked to the people in that compartment, searching for some story in their face or demeanor that would keep me awake. There was the quiet woman with big hair and loud makeup, the anxious map wielding tourist family, the starched adroit blue shirt business man, and the disheveled Williamsburg trustifairian in a mull-hawk and members only jacket. Even the slightly crazed or lost ones made no eye contact. Everyone kept a protected stance in their compacted proximity. Annoyance and mental distance was the most uniform body language exhibited in the varied inhabitants of the compartment.
I don’t know how much time had passed or how long I was out. It seemed like an instant that consciousness drifted to the lull of the tagged up dark tunnels and the flicker of lights. I awoke with the pressure of a weight on my right shoulder. It was a tender familiar weight like the way my brother would lay his head there on car rides home. I felt that first in my semiconscious state where the time and location of the moment seemed unclear. My eyes just then opening I heard a sound I couldn’t decipher. It was like a door creaking. In the same instant there was a tickling moist feeling on my toes like they were being tickled or licked. I opened my eyes and all the people were staring straight in my direction grinning like they all knew all my awkward secrets. I looked down to my right to see the elderly Chinese man so comfortably asleep on my shoulder. He looked so tender and at peace I almost couldn’t bear to wake him. But then I felt the tickling at my feet and saw his fish in the flimsy plastic bag flapping around like it was out to make a daring break. I started laughing out loud and so did everyone on the train. I poked the man on the shoulder gently and said "excuse me sir your...your fish..umm excuse me". He jumped up and screamed with surprise, then startled embarrassment. I felt so bad to having to evict him from his dream. But then I would have never gotten to see a whole subway compartment laugh.
|
