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The Stories...
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Love Stinks. Sometimes we get dumped.
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Soundtracks for dumpees
by h m
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You can savor getting dumped if you do it right. After the shock wears off, that wistful attitude starts to creep in. It's when you know you’re going to live to tell the tale, but you’re not ready to let the asshole out of your head. That’s where music comes in handy. Wicked break-up songs help to exorcise the demons by letting you get shamelessly melodramatic for a while. Even if you have to hear the song 100 times before you’re cured, it’s damn good medicine.
The first time I got dumped it was the 80s and I was 17 and hopelessly in lust with a really cute, slow-witted blonde stoner who was completely wrong for me. His stonewashed jeans were so tight he had to sit down to peel them off. He had a strong affinity for hockey, big trucks and Motley Crue. After we went out for about 4 months, he called me up and in his limited vocabulary said, “It just ain’t working out.” Ouch. So while my mom did cartwheels of rapture (she knew right away he was a bad seed), I holed up in my room for weeks with Aerosmith’s “What it Takes” set to repeat on my ghetto blaster. It's super cheesy, but that song was just so damn heartachey to me at the time. Here’s some lyrics (Insert Steven Tyler squeak indiscriminately): “Ooooh, I used to feel your fire/but now it’s cold inside/And you’re back on the street like you didn’t miss a beat/ Yeah, tell me what it takes to let you go.” I was soooo hard done by, yet it only took me a few weeks to get over him.
Other quitnessential high school-era break up songs? Hmmm... they ranged from the screaming big hair brigade to the goth and punk bands: “Every Rose Has its Thorn” by Poison, “Always” by Bon Jovi and “Love Hurts” by Nazareth. The Cure' album "Kiss Me Kiss Me Kiss Me", the Smiths' “Heaven Knows I’m Miserable Now.” The Pretenders’ song “Brass in Pocket” is the best, but it's more for when you've moved on to a new crush and you're feeling your mojo burning again.
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